it is worth it

1 Samuel 2:1-11

"Hannah prayed......

I’m bursting with God-news!
    I’m walking on air.
I’m laughing at my rivals.
    I’m dancing my salvation.

Nothing and no one is holy like God,
    no rock mountain like our God.
Don’t dare talk pretentiously—
    not a word of boasting, ever!
For God knows what’s going on.
    He takes the measure of everything that happens.
The weapons of the strong are smashed to pieces,
    while the weak are infused with fresh strength.
The well-fed are out begging in the streets for crusts,
    while the hungry are getting second helpings.
The barren woman has a houseful of children,
    while the mother of many is bereft.

God brings death and God brings life,
    brings down to the grave and raises up.
God brings poverty and God brings wealth;
    he lowers, he also lifts up.
He puts poor people on their feet again;
    he rekindles burned-out lives with fresh hope,
Restoring dignity and respect to their lives—
    a place in the sun!
For the very structures of earth are God’s;
    he has laid out his operations on a firm foundation.
He protectively cares for his faithful friends, step by step,
    but leaves the wicked to stumble in the dark.
    No one makes it in this life by sheer muscle!
God’s enemies will be blasted out of the sky,
    crashed in a heap and burned.
God will set things right all over the earth,
    he’ll give strength to his king,
    he’ll set his anointed on top of the world!

Elkanah went home to Ramah. The boy stayed and served God in the company of Eli the priest."

After all the years and years of yearning to be a mother, ridicule from the "other" woman who had many children, then finally getting the best gift in the world - Hannah gave her child over to the Lord, as she promised she would.  Then her response was - PRAISE God.

She followed through with her promise to the Lord, and dedicated her son to God's service, fully and completely.  Greater joy than having Samuel, was the joy she found when she placed him in the arms of the Father.  She made a very costly commitment, but it was worth it.

It is worth it.  

I remind myself of that daily.  When I take the trash bag out for the 87th time.  When I wash another sink full of dirty dishes.  When I fold another load of socks, underwear, gym shorts.  When I lay down on the couch for a "minute" and the phone rings or beeps.  When I get asked for another amount of money for something needed.  When I have no idea how I am going to buy more food.  When I am so tired I can't drive, but get in the car again.  When I have the same conversation over and over about not cussing, stealing, screaming, throwing gang signs, making a mess.   

It is worth it.

Hannah struggled with self worth.  She was not able to have children and the lies that came from others around her, made her feel insecure and lonely.  But something happened that day she prayed in the temple.  Something in the spirit broke over her mind, her heart, and her body.  All the years of being in the wasteland, were over in an instant.   

It is worth it.

God hears our prayers.  And he answers them too.  He doesn't leave us hanging.  He doesn't forget about us.  He doesn't forsake us.  He doesn't neglect us.  He doesn't sit us in the back of the room - He puts us right next to Him, in seats of honor and in robes of righteousness.   

It is worth it.

Children are a gift.  When they are messy, mad, moody - they are a messy, mad, moody gift.  When they are demanding, emotional, grumpy - they are a demanding, emotional, grumpy gift.  When they forget to lock the door, wash the dishes, turn the lights off - they are still a gift.  When you don't know where they are, won't answer the phone, make choices that are harmful to themselves, do things that could have them end up in jail or dead - yep, they are still a gift.  They are children, and they ARE a gift.   

It is worth it.

Yesterday there were 15 gifts in my house . Of all ages and all sizes.  The pantry was just about emptied out, again.  The trash was full, again.  The sink was full, again.  The floor was dirty, again.  The volume level was extremely high, again.  The rubbing of my head was in effect, again.  The moment the Lord stopped me in the middle of it all and reminded me what it was for, again..... 

It is worth it.

The more time I spend with Hannah, the more I feel so much like her.  I've been in that same wasteland that she was in - longing to have children, be a mother.  Years of knowing that God made me to be a mother, yet I was still single, still waiting.  And in an instant, God broke the things over me in the spirit that He broke over Hannah.  And I didn't get one child, I got about 100!  And just like Hannah committed Samuel over to the Lord, I am doing the same.  I was folding a pile of socks the other day, praying for one of my boys that is just going through some hard things, thinking to myself, "this is not what I had in mind" and Jesus sat on the table in front of me, smiled real big, handed me a sock, and said, "but this is exactly what I had in mind."   

It is worth it.